8 lip balms (none as large as your weird pritt stick ones). Keys, dog shit bags, dog treats, almonds (which get confused with dog treats), lip gloss (I am a 90s teenager and balm is not enough), ear pods (with my name on them in shiny stickers), glasses (sans case like a psychopath), cystitis sachet (one, old), a scarf and some tuc biscuits from last year.
Reading your posts makes me realise I’m not the only one that’s goes off on tangents and thinks of random references whilst eventually also trying to get to the point. Is this an actual medical condition or just an inability to concentrate? 🤔 Either way, samesies! 🤗
This is soo relatable! I had to lob my bag in the washing machine after a cream cheese based mishap last week. Wonder if that’s ever happened to Margot Robbie? While I was emptying it out pre wash, I found a secret pocket I’d forgotten about. Inside was £10 cold hard cash, a rock I found on a beach once and liked, and some very very sticky throat sweets. Treasure.
glad to see it's not just me carrying around bills and correspondence to shred at work. Joanne Harris's The Lollipop Shoes opens with the baddie outlining how easy it is to steal an identity from letters, and I must have had a really absorbent brain the day I read it nearly 20 years ago because it's never not with me 🫣
Oh my goodness, SO much cream cheese. Just the thinnest possible schmear, please.
(And I only have three lip balms in my bag at the moment: one in a cute Hello Kitty case, one with SPF, and one that I actually use. But I’m travelling, so it’s just the bare essentials.)
10/10. 5 stars. An excellent, funny mountain made out of a bizarre molehill. Made me laugh. "Too much cream cheese" is not a thing but ok. The end was endearing. Hope this contributes to ulcer prevention :)
I wish I could say mine was chic but the reality is poo bags by the dozen, receipts from too much wine and a lipstick which has probably lost the lid and got some sort of dog treat crumb around the edge. Nice.
Having that many lipbalms is GENIUS! I have one metal lipbalm jar of the Aloe Vaseline that I search the whole house for and move it with me everywhere I go, it's such a hassle. I should buy 6 more and spread them all over, including one in my bag. It will definitely save me about 20 minutes per day searching and relocating that emotional support tiny green metal jar.
Even more disconcerting than the ambassadorial perfume is when they pull out a full 1L bottle of gin and/or tequila from a brand that they just happen to own. Always a clunky moment. See: Emma Watson and Kendall Jenner.
They say the contents of your bag are a reflection of who you are as a person. This was masterful insight into the wondrousness that is you!!! It beats an organized bag any day, which, much to my chagrin, is reflected in my bag. It's got mini-zippered bags - one for sundries and another for makeup and brushes. Of course, I am somewhat OCD (along with my autism, ADHD, and cPTSD), so my bag reveals too much about me. We appreciate these insights into your soul and please do feel free to share more secrets and revelations here!!! Please say Hi to Matt for us! Love, love, love British Scandal, especially when you are narrating! Love the voices!
8 lip balms (none as large as your weird pritt stick ones). Keys, dog shit bags, dog treats, almonds (which get confused with dog treats), lip gloss (I am a 90s teenager and balm is not enough), ear pods (with my name on them in shiny stickers), glasses (sans case like a psychopath), cystitis sachet (one, old), a scarf and some tuc biscuits from last year.
Generation Game could never
I don’t know what that is. Famously I’m much younger than you.
Reading your posts makes me realise I’m not the only one that’s goes off on tangents and thinks of random references whilst eventually also trying to get to the point. Is this an actual medical condition or just an inability to concentrate? 🤔 Either way, samesies! 🤗
Nisha...what on earth do you mean?!
This is soo relatable! I had to lob my bag in the washing machine after a cream cheese based mishap last week. Wonder if that’s ever happened to Margot Robbie? While I was emptying it out pre wash, I found a secret pocket I’d forgotten about. Inside was £10 cold hard cash, a rock I found on a beach once and liked, and some very very sticky throat sweets. Treasure.
That rock was absolutely essential to carry around for the last 4 years, don’t let anyone tell you otherwise
Large cream tote
Deodorant. Aesop herbal.
Handsani. Also Aesop. Got done by the woman in the shop on broadway mkt who told me I needed hydration prods too. Desiccated coconut twin.
4 packs of tissues with 1-2 tissues in
Yellow pencil case with way more pens than I need in black, yellow and orange colours
No keys - forgot them
2 lip balms - 1 posh French pharmacy one year old, 1 tinted one, too brown for my coluring but still use
4 cards from bear snacks
Phone charger
3 red carrots
2 blood oranges
Bag with half a bunch of marjoram and half a bunch of coriander
The 4 x 2 tissues absolute pro clutterer move!
glad to see it's not just me carrying around bills and correspondence to shred at work. Joanne Harris's The Lollipop Shoes opens with the baddie outlining how easy it is to steal an identity from letters, and I must have had a really absorbent brain the day I read it nearly 20 years ago because it's never not with me 🫣
I’m trying to work out who you’re trying to subtly advertise as part of this post and you’re in the pocket of pocket tissues aren’t you?
Brilliant. You made me think more about the things I can never find in my bag, which like your Cilla clip reminded me of this at 3m30s - https://m.youtube.com/watch?si=R0IkYLBOggxLpKxC&embeds_referring_euri=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.google.com%2F&source_ve_path=MTY0OTksMjg2NjQsMTY0NTA2&v=ydAS8FGd668&feature=youtu.be
This would be me 🤦🏼♀️
Oh my goodness, SO much cream cheese. Just the thinnest possible schmear, please.
(And I only have three lip balms in my bag at the moment: one in a cute Hello Kitty case, one with SPF, and one that I actually use. But I’m travelling, so it’s just the bare essentials.)
I pressed play on this and a man read this to me. Didn't know that was a feature but enjoyed it!
10/10. 5 stars. An excellent, funny mountain made out of a bizarre molehill. Made me laugh. "Too much cream cheese" is not a thing but ok. The end was endearing. Hope this contributes to ulcer prevention :)
Have you thought about ordering a different filling? 😂
Wowwwww, Jack, if only life was SO simple
Oh Alice you are excellent. All of these have been so funny and brilliant. Can't wait to keep reading.
Katherine, you are a delight, please pop in again
I wish I could say mine was chic but the reality is poo bags by the dozen, receipts from too much wine and a lipstick which has probably lost the lid and got some sort of dog treat crumb around the edge. Nice.
Having that many lipbalms is GENIUS! I have one metal lipbalm jar of the Aloe Vaseline that I search the whole house for and move it with me everywhere I go, it's such a hassle. I should buy 6 more and spread them all over, including one in my bag. It will definitely save me about 20 minutes per day searching and relocating that emotional support tiny green metal jar.
Even more disconcerting than the ambassadorial perfume is when they pull out a full 1L bottle of gin and/or tequila from a brand that they just happen to own. Always a clunky moment. See: Emma Watson and Kendall Jenner.
They say the contents of your bag are a reflection of who you are as a person. This was masterful insight into the wondrousness that is you!!! It beats an organized bag any day, which, much to my chagrin, is reflected in my bag. It's got mini-zippered bags - one for sundries and another for makeup and brushes. Of course, I am somewhat OCD (along with my autism, ADHD, and cPTSD), so my bag reveals too much about me. We appreciate these insights into your soul and please do feel free to share more secrets and revelations here!!! Please say Hi to Matt for us! Love, love, love British Scandal, especially when you are narrating! Love the voices!