26 Comments
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Bella Mackie's avatar

You’re giving this gold away for free?

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Alice Levine's avatar

Thank you for being my industry plant

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Sinéad Connolly✨'s avatar

Not me liking this before I even started reading because I’m so excited to read more of Alice’s writing!

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Sinéad Connolly✨'s avatar

It delivered 😂

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Ed Smith's avatar

This is incredible. You've got Emma Stone and Ryan Gosling lined up for the movie, yes?

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Richard Makin's avatar

I’m SO glad this one made it to the Substack. I’ve retold this story so many times over the years I’d started to believe it was ME who ate that apple

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Chris's avatar

Legend. Imagine if this house belonged to someone semi-famous and they've been telling this very story from the other side for years.

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Clare Deane's avatar

It’s weird how I look down on other people’s yahoo and bt internet emails yet I’m so very proud of my hotmail email address.

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Laura's avatar

Oh god, do I have to get rid of my Hotmail??? I can’t face the admin.

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Alice Levine's avatar

Laura, it’s time…

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Alan Craig's avatar

Absolutely love this. I could see where it was going but it didn't take one thing away from the quality of it. 👍❤️

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Bradester's avatar

Love it Alice! Bet you were mortified 🤣

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Rob Cursons's avatar

You stole a tiny bit of the American dream

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Lins's avatar

This is one of the most beautifully told episodes of accidental breaking and entering I’ve ever read.

Equal parts Nancy Meyers, BBC drama, and soft-core anxiety spiral. The quiet confidence of just slipping past someone with a broom and a language barrier? Iconic.

I too would have made a sandwich. Possibly a nap. Maybe redecorated.

The towel-on-head moment deserves a BAFTA. 🖤

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Clare E's avatar

Is it really not acceptable to have Hotmail?

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Pete Wright's avatar

The rest of my day is now going to be spent wondering what the maid/cleaner was saying to you in Spanish and what was going through her head when you had walked past her and gone for a shower

“Vaya, esa es una bolsa muy grande, te ves terrible, por favor entra, date una ducha y hazte un sándwich.”

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Erick Morataya's avatar

Emma (my wife) still uses Hotmail... I still don't know how I feel about it.

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quinn🍐's avatar

the olden days sound scary, i don't even ring a mates doorbell before sending them a photo of theirfront door to check i'm at the right place

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Andy Gill's avatar

If you are a millennial who just says 'Gap Year' (possibly because you missed learning the proper pronunciation due to not having one) are you still a millennial? 🤔

Great read as always!

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